Her Demons
by MulderScullyShipper4Ever
Summary: Post Ep. for Mr. Monk on the Run Pt. 2. Natalie stood at the door in her pajamas. Monk hurried to open the door. Natalie has a nightmare and comes to Monk for comfort. M/N. Now, what happens when Monk thinks back to it.
1. Tears and Fears

**A/N: This is my first Monk story. My first fan fiction story. Reviews would be greatly appreciated. **

"Ugh." Monk groaned. There was someone at the door. He looked to his right at his alarm clock. It read 10:45. '_Can't I ever get any sleep?_' He needed his 10 hours of sleep or he was useless the next day. Grumpily, he got, slipped into his bathrobe and walked to the door.

Monk cautiously approached the door and looked through the peep hole. Standing the, outside his door was Natalie. She looked a fright. She was wearing her pajamas and looking very much disheveled. She almost looked as if she had jumped out of bed and into the car. Monk quickly opened the door and ushered her inside.

"Natalie, what's wrong? Why did you come here in the middle of the night?" Even as he said this he was running through all the scenarios in his head. He studied her closely and noticed her eyes were puffy and red. She had red streaks down her face. All in all, she looked like she had been crying. At this realization, he stood in front of her, looking her in the eyes.

"What's wrong? Are you okay? Did something happen to Julie?" he urged, his eyes shining with concern.

"Wha, I, she's fine. Really nothing is wrong. I'm just. I'm fine." Monk just stared at her incredulously then spoke.

"Natalie you've obviously been crying. Then you show up at MY house in the middle of the night. I know something is wrong." He continued to stare at her until she sighed and began again.

"Nothing is wrong. Okay you're right. Something is wrong. I- I had a nightmare." she ended quietly.

Monk was about to say '_You woke me up for a NIGHTMARE!_' when he recalled what Julie had told him earlier that very day_. "Mom wakes up hysterical. I think she still has nightmares that you died Mr. Monk."_

"Wha-What was it about?" He questioned as he led her towards the couch. '_Please don't be about me. I can't handle causing her any more pain. She doesn't deserve it._' She looked over at him, her eyes shining with pain.

"It was. It was about you. You were dead Mr. Monk. Dead for real. It just seemed too real. I had to, I had to come. I had to make sure you were okay. I just, I had to check…" Natalie broke down, sobbing and hugging herself.

Monk felt his heart breaking for Natalie. She had been through so much because of him. He knew she needed him to reassure her that he really was alive. Adrian didn't know what he could do. Well, he did know. But it frightened him. He knew he should go over to her and hold her. But the thought of holding someone besides Trudy scared him. No, the idea that he wanted to hold someone other than Trudy scared him. He desperately wanted to be holding Natalie. Adrian felt like something in the universe would be wrong if he didn't. And yet, his fear of germs was almost too powerful. Natalie sobbed again, louder this time. This made his mind up for him.

Monk slowly reached towards Natalie, putting his hand on her shoulder. '_Calm down Adrian, it's just Natalie._' This thought, far from reassuring him made him even more nervous. He couldn't afford to mess up here. With Natalie, his assistant, his best friend, almost everything to him. He felt her tense and the slowly relax as he slowly slipped his arm around her and pulled her to him. As Natalie put her head on his shoulder she felt Monk's arms encircle her. Natalie began to sob harder against his shirt, soaking it with tears. At the feeling of the tears Monk momentarily stiffened. Natalie felt him slowly rock her until she began to calm.

"Shh. I'm right here. I won't leave you again. Ever. I promise. Shh." Monk whispered continually as he slowly stroked her hair.

Natalie groggily smiled against his chest and squeezed him. Adrian could tell she was completely drained, both mentally and physically.

"Na-Natalie, don't you want to umm go home? I mean you-you have to sl-sleep right?" he nervously stuttered. He didn't want her to think he was kicking her out or abandoning her again. He just didn't have a place for her to stay the night. His couch didn't make for a very good bed.

Natalie visibly tensed at his words. She shook her head against his chest at his words and squeezed him tighter still.

"I just- I can't. I-I need to make sure. I need to know you really are here and that this isn't some cruel dream. I don't-I don't want to leave you."

Something in her voice sounded so desperate, so broken that it made Adrian hold her tighter to him. He felt as if he was protecting her, from what he didn't know. He felt her breathing slow, as if she was slowly falling asleep against him.

"I won't. Don't worry Natalie. You can, you can stay here. I won't leave you. Not tonight. And not ever again." he whispered. Through her sleep Natalie smiled. Adrian felt himself get sleepy and begin to fall asleep. He knew they'd both feel horrible in the morning if they slept on the couch so he carried her down the hall and into his room.

By now, Adrian knew he couldn't leave without causing her to panic. He skillfully drew back the covers with one hand, the other supporting Natalie and slowly slipped her inside of them. He quickly changed into his pajamas, surprisingly without feeling awkward with her sleeping right next to him. He knew she wouldn't do anything, even if she was awake and he doubted he would have felt awkward with her awake even.

He turned to look at her and was surprised at the way the light was illuminating her face. '_She looks so beautiful._' he thought. As Adrian raised a hand towards her face, he wondered what she would do if he ever kissed her.

He quickly erased the thought from his mind. '_Now's not the time._' he thought to himself. As he got into bed and turned to face her, he was surprised to see her looking at him.

"You okay?" She asked, knowing his phobia of touching other people, much less sharing a bed with them. Natalie was surprised by the honesty of his answer.

"I know it would seem like I should be, but somehow, for some reason I'm not. And I should be the one asking you that question, Natalie." he replied as he put his arm around her waist and pulled her towards him.

"Good Night Natalie."

"Night Adrian." And although Natalie had never used his first name before, this time it felt like the thing to do. It felt right.


	2. Valentine's Day Woes: Monk POV

**For those of you who read my story, Her Demons, and requested it to become a multi chap fic. This chapter takes place in the last season, shortly after the episode **_**Mr. Monk and the Badge**_**. So, here we go. I don't own Monk; if I did we'd have an established M/N relationship. Any and all feedback and criticism would be greatly appreciated.**

Adrian Monk had never been one to complain. Okay, he'd always complained, about everything, but this was different. He'd never ever had a thought like this. Today was Valentines Day. In his opinion, the worst day of the year after his and Trudy's anniversary, and her birthday; the thing that irked him most about Valentines Day was the couples. He hated the couples. The people in love, walking hand-in-hand, oblivious to the world, it disturbed him. It seemed every year the pain on this holiday got worse. Each year he spent parted from Trudy the pain was more, not less as some stated. And this year, for the first time wasn't because Trudy wasn't there with him.

It was all Natalie's fault, at least in his mind. If she hadn't asked to see his bellybutton and tried to pull up his shirt he wouldn't be in this mess. There was also the time that she planted kisses all over his face after they thought he was dead and she'd come to rescue him. Then her, arriving at his apartment and making him, well he chose, to let her stay with him. It wasn't that he hated these things at all. In fact it was the exact opposite. He couldn't forget the way they felt. He didn't want her to wipe the kisses away. He didn't want her to stop trying to see his bellybutton, or for her to leave the day after she'd spent the night. Monk couldn't believe himself. He'd told himself not to believe anything could come of it. No one could ever love him. At least that's what he thought. He had thought of Natalie in THAT way more than once, but it had never been like this. For some reason, after spending the week apart they had, he'd begun to miss her more.

He hated the thought of her on date with some other man, even if the "date" was only in his mind. The mere fact that she had a new boss who was going to take her to Denver on his private plane made him jealous. This was a new emotion for him. He'd never felt jealous of anyone who got to spend time with Natalie before. Now, it was Valentines Day. To be precise it was 12:00 am on Valentines Day.

The only reason he was awake was because of that awful dream he'd been having lately. Natalie left him. She'd got a new job and drifted away from him. This was his nightmare. No Natalie. Then, his dream would torment him even worse. He could see her, in the parking garage, turning the key in the ignition. A switch flipped, and then the car turned into a fireball. He could hear her anguished screams echoing across the empty garage. That's what was haunting him now. He was afraid he'd lose her or she'd die before hearing how he felt towards her. How he'd only felt once in life before this time.

Now, he had to think of a way to show her just how much she meant to him. Especially after telling her she got a pay cut when she returned to him after he quit the force again. Not another disaster like his Secretaries Day gift, but a real, honest present. Not only that, but he had to think of it before she arrived in 8 hours. Romance had never been his strong suit and it was worrying him now more than ever. Especially since today she was planning on going out with the new detective in homicide, Carlson.

Monk shook his head almost as if he was trying to rid it of any errant thoughts. Of course, he shook it an even ten times. It was time to formulate a plan.

**Well, that's all for now. Reviews are greatly appriciated. The next chapter should be up on Sunday or Monday hopefully.**


	3. Valentine's Day Woes: Natalie POV

**A/N: A giant thank you to those who reviewed and added the story to their favorites list. Here comes the next chapter. Again, I don't own Monk or he and Natalie would be together way back in season six.**

Natalie rolled onto her back groaning. It was the third night in a row she couldn't sleep and it was entirely his fault. If he'd not almost gotten killed again while working the pickaxe case she wouldn't be having these dreams again. At least that what she told herself to calm her nerves. The stupid dream always started with him getting shot by Captain Stottlemeyer. His cold, lifeless eyes staring up as his body hit the water, causing a huge splash. Then it would morph into his funeral, a closed casket because she couldn't bear to see his corpse. It was worse now, after they'd bonded then it was when she thought he was dead the after Leland told her what had happened. Luckily, Julie was at college and didn't have to wake up to her screams of terror.

Today was a day that was made worse by virtue of the fact that Mitch hadn't been with her to celebrate in over 16 years. She was having a harder time this year than usual, and not just because she missed Mitch, but because of the feelings she'd been trying to hide for her boss, Adrian Monk. She thought it all started back when he was "dead" and then found her again. That night had been a part of her sleeplessness lately, thinking about how selfless he'd been during that time and how much she actually enjoyed it. The day after that had been a pleasant surprise in itself as well.

[Flashback]

She rolled over onto her back and realized that, for the first time in years she was not alone in her bed. That was the first warning sign. The second, this wasn't her bed. '_How did I get here? And where is here?' _Natalie felt her heartbeat rise as she struggled to remember the previous night. She chanced a peek and opened her left eye first and then suddenly opening her right as she recognized the room. '_How did I end up in-in Adrian's bed?'_ As she twisted around to try and get free of the arm that was trapping her to a man's chest she began to remember. Her arrival on his doorstep ragged and crying and subsequent spending the night at his apartment. The final words they spoke to each other and his honest admission that he didn't know why he was letting her stay, just that he thought he should.  
As Natalie looked up to see if Adrian was asleep she realized that the one thought she hadn't had was one of surprise to find herself with Monk lying with her, only that she was in his bed. She smiled to herself and relaxed. Adrian, for once was still sleeping at 8 am. Sighing, Natalie allowed herself to fall back asleep in his arms, content to have someone to protect her, even if that someone was her dysfunctional, obsessive compulsive boss, Adrian Monk.

[End Flashback]

In the end, he'd ended up cooking for the two of them and giving Natalie the day off from being his assistant. That day, they were just two good friends lounging about in an apartment. Natalie sighed, frustrated that the only time she got to talk to him in the past week was one phone call.

Then, as they were recruited back to being the private detective and assistant, the new rookie David Carlson had asked her on a date today. Natalie thought he was good looking in his own way, but she wished now that she hadn't accepted his offer. Today she wanted to spend her time with him. Not that he would notice today was Valentine's Day or even buy her a present. Sometimes she wondered why she even put up with Adrian Monk.

Natalie sighed, giving up on trying to sleep. She turned to face the clock, surprised it read 2:35 and not midnight. But it was still early enough for her to try to come up with some excuse to cancel on David. Knowing Adrian, he'd probably have some "emergency" that she was needed for. Natalie smiled, relaxing because of the fact that her boss had more "emergencies" on the nights when she had dates with men. None of this was lost on Natalie who realized that he still had no idea that he tended to stop her from going out. This had bothered her at first, but now it felt like a comforting pattern for life.

Finally, Natalie decided to try to sleep one last time when the phone began to ring, cutting the silent air like a knife.

She reached for the phone, a smile on her face as she knew who the caller would be. Who else but Monk would call her at 2:35 in the morning.

"Hey Mr. Monk," Natalie greeted, sounding cheerful and awake.

"Hi Natalie, did I wake you up?"

"No, not tonight. I couldn't sleep. What do you need?" she asked, almost laughing at the silly happiness she felt at him calling her this early. He probably wanted her to come in an hour early to work today.

"Really, well, I couldn't sleep either. I was wondering if you wouldn't mind coming into work an hour or two later than usual?" he asked, sounding nervous and almost scared.

_Predictable Mr. Monk I can always count on him to ask me to come to work early. Wait, he said later, didn't he? _As Natalie tried to puzzle the reason out she found herself agreeing.

"Sure Mr. Monk, I'll see you at 10 then. Good night." She said, silently wishing he would remember today's holiday.

"Oh. That's great Natalie! Thank you so much! Have a happy Valentine's Day!" he replied, sounding much relieved. Before Natalie could wish him the same he'd hung up.

_'That wasn't normal. I wonder what he could be up to .I hope it's not anything bad. '_ Natalie thought as she turned over in her bed, finding herself better able to sleep after having heard his voice. She was still trying to figure out what he meant when she fell back asleep.

**A/N: So, good or bad? Any and all reviews would be greatly appreciated. Hope to have another chapter up by Friday.**


	4. The Big Plan: Monk POV

**A/N: A giant virtual hug from Natalie and Monk to all who reviewed my story. Your criticism and encouragement are much appreciated. I don't own Monk or the song Come Away With Me by Norah Jones.**

The cold water poured down over Monk as he continued to rack his brain for a plan. It had been over an hour since his early morning wake up, or more accurately the nightmare that disrupted his sleep for the entire week he'd been back on the force. It wasn't that he'd been awaked at midnight, he always did that; it was the fact that he had been having a nightmare again. He shivered as the water turned into a frigid drizzle that truly awakened him. After his exact ten minutes was up he stepped out of the shower and walked through his apartment to his bedroom.

His routine of getting dressed took him longer than usual as he tried to find his best looking outfit for the day- something that would show Natalie his more romantic side. He restlessly flipped through his closet until he saw a little used charcoal suit jacket and salmon colored shirt. He slipped into his shirt, buttoning in top the top before changing his mind and leaving the top button undone. He found matching pants, socks and shoes and began to pull them on before deciding to go with a change, the only pair of blue jeans he owned, a dark blue pair that complimented the shirt perfectly. He smiled, feeling relaxed and yet nervous for what was still to come.

After completing his morning hygiene routine; twice, to be safe, he turned his brain to the problem at hand. What could he do to show Natalie how he felt about her? Asking Leland was out of the question as he and Trudy were off on a romantic vacation to the beach for Valentine's Day. Randy was out because he was even worse at keeping secrets than Monk was, a trait Adrian still found amazing.

His next best idea was to turn to Natalie, which he obviously couldn't do because she could tell when he was lying or hiding something better than anyone. So who? Dr. Kroger would have helped him; but then again, Dr. Kroger wasn't alive anymore. Dr. Bell might help, but not this early in the morning. He sighed, realizing he was alone in planning the day. What made it worse to think about was being alone on Valentine's Day. Frantically, he began to rack his brain for anything Natalie had said she'd liked. Jazz, and vocal music, he knew she loved that, especially Norah Jones. And all women love flowers, right? Suddenly Monk remembered the Secretary's Day fiasco and decided maybe not flowers. For some reason he couldn't remember what she'd said when talking about gifts after that day. He was too busy being disappointed that she didn't like his gift he hadn't been paying attention to her talking to him.

Monk turned to his radio and decided to see if anyone had advice for someone as helpless and clueless as him who hadn't been on a date in over 12 years. He chuckled as the radio turned on, it was still set to 91.5, an odd number, but he'd put up with it only because Natalie had changed it to that station. The song that was playing was very familiar; a favorite of Natalie's called "Come Away With Me". He smiled as he remembered the time, just about three months ago, when they'd danced to this very song at her friends' wedding.

As the familiar intro faded into the lyrics, Monk began to remember his dance with Natalie.

_Come Away With Me in the Night_

_Come Away With Me and I Will Write You a Song_

He recalled his nervous movements after she'd asked him to dance. Being tense, awkward and how she slowly let him relax. He found himself swaying to the music alone, an imaginary partner, as he relived his dance with Natalie.

_Come Away With On a Bus_

_Come Away With Me Where They Can't Tempt Us _

_With Their Lies_

_And I Wanna Walk With You _

_On A Cloudy Day_

_In Fields Where the Yellow Grass Grows Knee-High_

_So Won't You Try To Come_

Another idea struck him; to go for a walk in one of San Francisco's many parks. This year, he'd be walking with those annoying romantic couples instead of staring at them.

_Come Away With Me and we'll kiss_

_On A Mountaintop_

_Come Away With Me_

_And I'll Never Stop Loving You_

As the instrumental break filtered through the speakers he found himself thinking about cooking for the two of them, breakfast for two.

_And I Want to Wake Up With the Rain_

_Falling On a Tin Roof_

_While I'm Safe There In Your Arms_

_So All I Ask Is For You To_

_Come Away With Me in the Night_

_Come Away With Me_

As the last chord of the piano faded, Monk began to worry again. A lightbulb went off in his head. '_I should play this song when she arrives. Better yet, all the songs we've danced to.'_ Monk went from being elated to sad as he realized he had no idea how to get songs onto one CD and, he checked his watch, in less than six hours. He now began to worry about how he would tell her his feelings when the radio blared again.

"That was Norah Jones with Come Away With Me. Now, for all you romantically challenged guys out there we have a special guest tonight: Dr. Stephen Bell! He's a certified psychologist who deals with this all the time. He's here to answer any questions you might have about how to tell that special someone you love them. The call in number is 1-510-LOVE."

Monk was startled; he wondered if this Dr. Bell could be his therapist. Quickly, he grabbed his phone an dialed the number. On the third ring it was picked up.

"Hello caller. You are on 91.5 KCMN with Dr. Stephen Bell. What's your name and what do you need help with tonight?" Monk relaxed at the familiar voice and almost laughed aloud.

"It's Monk. Adrian Monk. I was calling because well, Dr. Bell, I don't know how to tell her that I love her, well that I'm in love with her. I want today to be special, but I have no idea as to what to do." Monk sighed dramatically towards the end of his speech.

"Adrian! What a pleasant surprise. I know Adrian here from my private practice. So what you're saying, Adrian, is that you don't know how to tell Natalie how you feel? You need help planning a romantic surprise for her?"

Adrian swallowed hard and began. "Yeah. I don't know what to do. It's been quite a long time since I've been on a date."

"Well what time will she be over today?"

"She always gets here at precisely 8 am." Adrian replied happily.

"Well, for starters, ask her to come in later, maybe 10? I know this may sound like a surprise to you, but I think she'll know if you start to tell her. Just tell her what she means to you. I think if you try you'll do the right thing. Good luck!"

"Bu-" Adrian was cut off by the dial tone. At least Dr. Bell had helped him be certain of one thing- she'd come in late. He sighed, still confused as to what to do. Slowly, his ideas began to mesh together. He'd make her breakfast, give her flowers and perhaps chocolate. Then he'd ask her to dance, if he got up the courage, that is. Then he'd tell her how he felt, if he could find the courage somehow. He glanced up at the clock and saw it was 2:35, the perfect time to call Natalie and put this in motion. Satisfied she suspected nothing Adrian began to compose a list of things to do.

**A/N: So, how was that? Good, bad, ugly? Please review! Next chapter: Natalie heads to Monk's house for a big surprise. Should be up next Sunday.**


	5. Putting It All Into Action

**A/N: Sorry it's taken so long to update this, but I was in Europe for months with no internet. I've got the next few chapters written out and ready, but I need to type them up and publish them. This is a little short, but I feel like it's a major plot point that needs to be included. The next chapter should be put up next Sunday morning.**

Adrian Monk had every moment planned out perfectly from the time Natalie was set to arrive to when they would say goodbye. Except for one major, well for Adrian Monk, major part. He didn't know if Trudy would approve of this. Sure, she'd died 10 years ago, but he hadn't solved her murder yet and it haunted him. It haunted him more than his fear that everyone would leave him. Even Trudy left him, though due to extremely unfortunate circumstances.

"Oh Trudy, what have I done? I haven't even solved your murder, yet here I am about to go on a date with another woman."

He put his head in his hands and began to cry; tears for losing Trudy and for not being able to solve her murder. As he sat wallowing in his misery the atmosphere in the room changed. SHE was there.

"Adrian, darling, don't cry. Now tell me what's bothering you my love." Trudy spoke as she gently caressed his face and rubbed his back.

Adrian looked morosely at his wife and began to speak, "I'm moving on. I think. I've got a date, sort of, with my assistant Natalie and I haven't even solved your murder yet. I'm a horrible detective if I can't even solve your case. I haven't solved it and yet I'm having…. Feelings for another woman! For Natalie!" he exclaimed, getting frustrated with himself.

Trudy smiled at her husband knowingly and began to speak, "Oh sweetie. You can move on; should move on. Do you think I've wanted to see you spend every day of the past 12 years in mourning for me, unable to function? I've been hoping you would move on and watched you grow closer to Natalie hoping you would do this very thing. If you'd died you'd have wanted me to move on and be happy if you died, I know you would. Be happy Adrian. Then you'll know who my love."

"But I can't be happy. You were my one chance at that." he quipped, not wanting to admit that she was right.

"Do you really believe that Adrian? Or are you scared to move on from what you've known? You can be happy again. The key is, well you're starting to find out. Now take off that ring and go be happy."

"Trudy," Monk sighed, looking at his left hand and finding he didn't feel compelled to wear it on his hand, "Okay, I'll try. But I'm not sure I can be happy."

"Promise me you'll try my love."

"I promise." With those words Trudy gave one last smile and vanished into thin air. He turned to his hand again and took the ring off. Monk looked at it and didn't want to put it away just yet.

'Don't worry,' a ghostly voice whispered, 'There will be another one there soon.' Monk shook his head and walked towards his room.

He went to Trudy's jewelry drawer and grabbed a fine chain, brushing past the velvet box that contained her engagement ring and put the ring on. It was hanging around his neck, tucked under his shirt collar. He then went to go wash his hands from the dirt that had accumulated, despite having washed them just 10 minutes previously.

As he returned to the couch he noticed the house seemed to be brighter and maybe a little happier than usual.

The apartment was unusually silent, even for Monk's standards, which worried Natalie even more as she walked into his apartment at 10 am, instead of 8.

"Hello?"

There was no sign of her boss until she entered the living room, where she found him leaning back against the couch with his hands behind his head, asleep. Content; with a smile on his face.

"Mr. Monk? Adrian?" Natalie called, slightly worried now that he hadn't heard her come in because he was usually a light sleeper with the slightest sound waking him up. She walked up to him, and convinced he was simply asleep, and nothing was horribly wrong with him began to study his face.

There was a peace there that Natalie had not seen on it, well, ever. It made him look years younger, without a single line of worry marring his handsome visage. Natalie walked up to him and gave his shoulder a gentle shake.

"Adrian," she called, "time to wake up." The movement did the trick. Within moments he was awake and staring up at Natalie.

"Na-Natalie? What are you doing here? It's only 8-" Monk blinked twice as he saw the clock. 10:12 am.

'_I've been asleep for two hours?_' Monk thought, slightly confused but more worried now that his plan would have to be enacted.

"Oh." Monk said, standing up in front of Natalie, just inches away.

Natalie felt her face flush as Adrian stood in front of her, his lips just a few inches away. She longed to kiss him now, but knew that would not lead to anything good. She turned away from him, taking a step towards the kitchen.

"I'll go make some coffee." She mumbled, rushing away.

Adrian was confused. Why had Natalie run off, blushing? To the kitchen. THE KITCHEN! He couldn't let her see the kitchen; it would ruin the perfect surprise he had planned.

"Natalie!" His voice was panicked now, "Don't go in the kitchen! It's… I need to clean out the fridge. Just wait in the office. Please." He added, dashing to intercept her. It was too late. Natalie had entered the kitchen.

"Mr.- Adrian? What's all this?" she asked, waving her hand in the direction of the food, flowers, and chocolates he had on the counter. Monk walked into the kitchen his face turning slightly red now.

"It's, a um…" he breathed deeply before trying again. "Happy Valentines Day?" he asked, running his finger over his eyebrow and straightening the collar of his shirt. He re-buttoned the top, then un buttoned it again. He was fidgety now, trying to straighten everything within reach while keeping himself from looking at Natalie.

Natalie's hand reached to cover her open mouth. He'd been trying to give her a Valentine's surprise. Her face turned red again and her eyes started to water. Monk looked at her then.

"Nat-Natalie? Did I do something wrong? I knew I shouldn't have… You'd never feel that-"

"No, Adrian. It's perfect." She said giving him a watery smile.

"Then why are you crying? You don't have to lie to make me feel better, you know." He said, turning around in a defeated motion. "You can go home if you want to." He started to walk away; saddened that Trudy had been wrong about it. He knew it was too good to be true. He stopped walking when he felt a hand grab his.

"Really Adrian, it's beautiful." Natalie said, stepping in front of him and squeezing his hand. "I just wasn't expecting you to get me such a big gift. You didn't have to you know. A card is good enough for a friend." She smiled and gave him an unexpected hug. Even more surprising then the fact that he didn't move away was the fact that Monk, Adrian Monk, wrapped his arms around Natalie and hugged her back.

"Natalie," Monk began, "you're more than my friend. You're my ass…partner and my best friend too-" He stopped speaking suddenly, searching for the right words to tell Natalie exactly what she was, but finding none, was at a loss. A voice, long dormant in his mind told him the right thing to do to show Natalie how much she meant to him would be to kiss her, but he wasn't sure how she would react to that.

Natalie was enthralled with the feeling of being in his arms, her head resting against his chest, as she knew that this was difficult for him and might never happen again. She had imagined it for so long now, wanted it to be a reality at least since Sparks had happened; even more so after the night she'd spent with him. '_No._' she firmly told herself. _'I'm not even going to go there. It's inappropriate to think of him that way. He'd never feel that way, much less kiss me.'_

She felt him stiffen slightly and let go, figuring he was getting uncomfortable with the hug and looked up at him. Monk had a far away look in his eyes, as if he was thinking about Trudy or trying to remember something. He took a deep breath and relaxed again, looking at Natalie.

His voice was shaky and nervous. "Natalie, would you mind if we… danced?"

She felt herself grow excited with each word, until he said dance. She was hoping he would, well, kiss her. But dancing was still better than not being near him at all.

"I-of course." Natalie replied, her voice sounding slightly disappointed.

Natalie smiled at Monk who went to put on the music. He mentally shook his head. '_You should have just kissed her. She wanted you too_.' The thought shocked him, but when he thought about her disappointment it made sense. '_Natalie wants to kiss me._' He thought, happier now.

Smiling, Monk pushed the CD into the player and turned the volume to about half way. He held out a hand to Natalie and they began to dance.

Natalie gasped as the song came on. It was the very first one that they'd ever danced to, at a friends wedding just over a year ago.

"You remembered?" she asked.

"Natalie," Monk sighed, "I remember everything. Photographic memory, remember." Monk grinned at the pun and pulled Natalie closer.

Natalie smiled, shocked at his actions. She stared at their hands, still intertwined, and noticed that his wedding ring was absent.

"Adrian," Natalie asked softly, "Where did your ring go?"

Monk smiled and shrugged. "Trudy said it was time to move on. She told me to take it off." He took his hand off of Natalie's waist and reached under the collar of his shirt. The ring glinted as a ray of sunshine hit it.

"Oh." Natalie replied, suddenly understanding. Adrian's ring fell back against his shirt and he reached a hand towards Natalie's face. He traced her cheek, down to her lips where she kissed his fingers.

Her eyes widened as she realized what she'd done.

"I'm sorry Adr-" her words were cut off as he placed a single finger on her lips.

"Would you be totally opposed to me kissing you?" he asked, a bold move for him, as he slowly leant towards Natalie

"No." she replied, leaning in as well.


	6. Interruptions

**A/N: I know it's been a long time since I've updated and I was going to put this up on Valentine's day, but I got a surprise visit from someone so I got a little distracted. Hope it satisfies for now. I don't own Monk or there would have been at least 10 seasons. **

Leland Stottlemeyer was not having a good Valentine's Day weekend. He and T.K. were supposed to go on a romantic vacation to a spa, which did happen, but now there was a serial killer on the loose there. There were no clues as to how the man did it, or who he was. It made for a romance less trip. But they needed to solve the case, and fast before any more couples got killed; which meant having to call in San Francisco's most brilliant detective. Adrian Monk would not like this case at all.

Aside from the fact that Valentine's was one of his least favorite holidays, there was the fact that he'd have to go undercover, with a female cop, as a married couple. He did not want to call Monk in, but the unknown causes of death of four couples with no leads were forcing him to. He sighed, resigned to a hard weekend dealing with his various phobias and "things".

He wished Natalie could be a part of it, but the department was insistent that there be an actual cop there. With the most recent murder, he had been revealed as a cop, and thus the value of him and T.K. was moot. Leland knew that the only way it would work was if Natalie was there with him. She had always calmed Monk down, more than Sharona could, almost as well as Trudy did. Trudy. Monk's world had collapsed around him with the death of his wife Trudy. He had spent almost two years spiraling into a depression and nearly killed himself, cleaning as much as he did. Sharona had helped Monk get a job again and barely function in society. When she left, his world had again begun to spiral downwards until Natalie came along. Natalie. The woman was a wonder. Working her case had started his recovery. He'd watched them grow closer each and every case. The working relationship had turned into something more, perhaps even from the first case; both having lost spouses made them closer and more supportive of the other from the beginning. After the incident with Sherriff Rollins, there was a new kind of dimension to it. Almost as if they couldn't be without each other anymore. He'd noticed that after they'd returned home, there was a new closeness; almost as if they were together. Romantically involved. The thought was absurd in his mind, but ever present as he'd noticed that Monk hadn't asked for a single wipe, even if he did touch Natalie or when she touched him. The subtle smiles, the relaxed demeanor, and his concern for her warmed his heart. It also made him warier of Natalie, hoping she would not leave him or hurt him, even unintentionally because he knew Monk would never recover from it. He hoped that one day they would wake up, or Monk would wake up because Natalie wouldn't wait forever.

He'd known that Natalie had fallen for her quirky boss at least by the time that he'd pretended to kill him and Monk had gone to Nevada by her reaction when she'd found out he was "dead". She had been so torn up that she had used all her savings on his funeral and ceremony. When he returned, it had saved her from going down the path that she'd already had to face once. He was jarred from his ruminations by the ringing of his cell phone.

"Captain Stottlemeyer speaking"

"Hey Captain, its Randy,"

His voice immediately became exasperated, "Yes, Randy, what do you want?"

"Well, there are no female cops who are willing to go undercover with Monk. So the Chief said that it would be okay for Natalie to step in, as long as there is no danger. She can't end up getting hurt in a police investigation again."

The captain's spirits improved slightly at this. "Thanks Randy. I'll go tell Monk and Natalie. It should be easier with them both going."

"You know, I still say aliens abducted them and killed them Captain. There's evidence of that you know. I think I saw this TV show with two FBI agents investigating something like that once. I-"

"Randy, Randy. That was a fictional show. It was called the X-Files. There are no such things as aliens or abductions. Goodbye." He shook his head and chuckled at Randy's crazy theory of the week.

"But Captain there are stor-" He hung up on Randy and closed his phone.

"Where does he get that stuff?" he wondered aloud. He than left the car and walked up to Monk's apartment building. He stood in front of apartment 2G for 10 minutes after knocking. There was no response. He could hear what sounded like jazz through the door. After knocking again, he decided that it was important enough to go in. He pulled out his spare key to Monk's apartment and unlocked the door. As he stepped into the house he looked around. There was no one in the entry way or hall. He made his way to the kitchen, where he found the flowers and chocolates, still untouched. _'Now that's unusual. What's going on here?'_

Things got weirder still when he walked into the living room. There was some slow jazz playing, Norah Jones. It was Natalie's favorite song. As he looked around the room there was another sight that completely made him think he was in the wrong apartment. Monk and Natalie stood, leaning towards each other, about to kiss.

He cleared his throat loudly. "Am I interrupting something?" he asked, smirking.

They jumped accidently bumping lips as he startled them out of their world.

Natalie came to her senses first, "No."

"What did you need Leland?" Monk asked, still distracted by Natalie and looking at her lips. They moved so that they were standing next to each other, facing him now.

"You're needed on a case. Four double murders with no clues. Just that the people were vacationing at the same spa. We need you to go undercover there. We need a new couple there."

"Umm Captain, when I said no undercover after the DePalma case, I meant it. Adrian got confused about his personality after that one."

"Natalie, I don't want him to this, but we have no choice the Chief requested Monk on this one because he can see things no one else can. You need to be packed and at the police station in an hour Monk. No excuses."

"I-I can't Captain; I don't do undercover. Especially not with people, you know that I don't know. I can't pretend to you know, kiss someone. Or anything like that." He twitched and rolled his shoulders until Natalie put a calming hand on his arm. It seemed to relax him immediately.

"Well it's a good thing the department agreed that Natalie could go too then." He said, "You'll need to be an engaged couple. The others all were newly engaged, spending a romantic vacation there. And Monk, try not to be you. You have blend in. Be normal. None of your suits or anything; wear jeans and normal shirts."

Monk and Natalie exchanged a look, surprised that she would be allowed to work undercover with him.

"Captain, isn't this a bit… dangerous? I mean if four couples have been killed why not send in other undercover officers?" Natalie asked.

"T.K. and I are actually relaxing there. We were trying to enjoy the weekend, but the new killer is making that impossible. Everyone knows I'm police, so I won't be of any use anyways. We can watch your backs. But you won't be able to know us beforehand. We'll have to arrange a meeting. But you shouldn't be seen with us that much or they'll figure it out."

"I don't want to do this Leland. I have a bad feeling about it." Monk said, thinking of all the things that engaged couples did. He shuddered in partial disgust and maybe some nervousness. He wondered where they were getting the ring for it and thought perhaps he had one that would work.

"When do you not have a bad feeling about anything Monk? You have to do this in order to keep your job. I have to arrange the rest of this undercover. I'll see you in an hour at the police station." He said and walked out of the apartment, closing the door behind him.

Monk sighed, uneasy about the whole thing. It scared him to go undercover again. At least Natalie would be there for him; with him. She'd make it easier to get through.

"Well that was nice. There goes Valentine's Day." She muttered, walking towards the bedroom.

"Natalie!" Monk called, "You can't go in my room!"

"Adrian! I have to! We've got to get packed. I have a feeling we'll need to go buy you clothes for this." She replied shaking her head, "They better reimburse us for that..." she muttered continuing her walk. She was irritated at the Captain for choosing that moment to barge in and then he had to ruin the rest of their day as well.

He walked, defeated and followed Natalie into his bedroom. She already had a suitcase open and was tossing clothes in.

"Natalie!" Monk exclaimed, exasperated, "You can't just throw the clothes in there! They have to be folded then put from light to dark! Natalie!" He began to re-pack everything that had just been tossed into the suitcase.

"There!" Natalie triumphantly exclaimed, "We're done with that. Now just grab your toiletries and we'll go to my house to get my clothes then buy you some shorts and swim trunks."

"Sw-sw-swim trunks? Natalie I don't do water! I don't do pools! Do you know how many germs are swimming around in a pool?" He whined looking mortified at the very thought.

"Call the Captain," he began, "I can't do this. I'm not tough enough to. It'll never work."

"Mr. Monk! Mr. Monk! Adrian! Calm down, you'll be fine. I'll be right there with you the whole time, I promise. It shouldn't take long at all knowing you. You'll solve the crime and have us out of there by tomorrow morning. I know it." Natalie walked up to him and rubbed soothing circles on his back.

"Come on, we've got to get everything done in 45 minutes."

"Thank you Natalie." Monk spoke with determination, "For everything. I really wouldn't be able to this without you." He turned her to face him and with a courage neither knew he possessed he gave Natalie a small kiss on the lips. It wasn't anything invasive, but it charged the air between them, bringing back feelings Natalie had tried to bury, and that Monk didn't know he could feel after Trudy's death. The rush of emotions intensified the kiss, bringing them both to part, slightly overwhelmed with the sensations. Suddenly overwhelmed, Adrian turned away from Natalie and took a few deep breaths closing his eyes. He opened them to find a confused Natalie looking at him in concern.

"Are you okay M- Adrian?"

"Yes. I think I am Natalie. It's just been a long…" he cut off, realizing it had been over 10 years since he'd kissed someone like that. On a feeling, a whim, and felt that rush of love again.

"-a long time." Natalie finished for him. "I know, Mr. Monk, for me too."

"Natalie, I think, I think you should probably call me Adrian, especially if this is going to work." He gestured between the two of them and smiled at her.

"I know Adrian, but sometimes I still… It's been, what six years of calling you Mr. Monk? Takes some time, you know?" she smiled back at him and they continued on the way out of the house. They were almost to the car when Adrian suddenly had a thought.

"Natalie, I forgot something upstairs. I'll be right back." He said, running up the steps to his apartment. He walked into his bedroom and to the nightstand that he never used. He opened the drawer and pulled out a dark purple velvet box. He opened it and looked at the ring shining up at him. It was gold, with ten evenly spaced diamonds adorning it. '_Perfectly even. If we're going undercover as an engaged couple…'_ Monk thought as he closed the box and slipped it inside the pocket of his jacket. '_We might as well do it correctly._'

As Natalie was packing her clothes into the other side of suitcase Monk was pacing in the upstairs bathroom. In this very spot almost two years ago he promised her he would come home once he figured out who was trying to frame him for murder. Here was the last time she saw him before thinking he was dead. He couldn't imagine what that would feel like. He didn't have to imagine what that felt like. He knew what it felt like, to remember the last place you saw your loved ones face and have to go there and live there every day. He'd been doing that for the past 10 years. He wondered if she loved him, even back then.

"Yes. I did love you then too, Adrian. This moment here, it made me realize how much you meant to me. Especially when I thought you were…" Natalie spoke quietly, startling him, as he didn't even realize he'd been speaking out loud.

"I…. know… it was the only… I thought it might be the last time I'd see you…. You have no idea how hard it was… I almost called you… I even dialed your number before realizing that Sheriff Rollins might be listening. Leland told me how hurt you were… I never, I guess I couldn't see it then." He said looking at her. He seemed distracted, focusing on something else as he spoke again.

"Are you ready?"

"Yeah, I'm just about done. I just have to grab my shampoo and toothbrush." She replied, brushing past him and picking up the aforementioned items.

"We'd better get there soon. The captain's already called twice." She said as she checked her phone on the way out of the house.

"Oh. Okay…. Natalie, wait a second." Monk said, as he reached his left hand into his jacket. "I figured because we're going to be undercover as… well…. Being engaged…that maybe… well… here." He took out the box and showed her the ring.

"But, Adrian, its Trudy's ring." Natalie exclaimed surprised and honored that he would even consider letting it be used for undercover police work.

"Exactly Natalie. You deserve to wear it. It won't distract me because I know it's perfectly even. Besides, who knows where the police would get one… It could be covered in germs or … uneven." He replied, taking it out of the box and slipping it onto her left hand. It was a perfect fit.

"I… Thank you Adrian." Natalie said, again surprised at what this man was capable of.


End file.
